The Confidence Blog

Would you believe failing can be a good thing?

Failing can allow us to learn from our mistakes.
Failing can allow us to determine what we really want.

In my opinion, it is considered failing when whatever happens keeps you stuck.  You start beating yourself up, and don’t take the risk to try again.  If you tend to do that, then yes I can see why you would think you have failed.

The successful confident person is the one who ask questions and tries again and again until they succeed. 

The other day I was speaking with a friend and I was telling her what I had just discovered one of my limited beliefs.  I was reading Napoleon Hill and he was speaking about Andrew Carnegie on how he went from nothing to having more than 100 million dollars.  And the thought and feeling came over me that he is the exception, not the norm.  Now with all my training and my own life experience I know that statement was based in fear, not logic, because I know we can have and do anything we want to, because we create our own reality.  So I did some EFT on the new information that came up, and released the feeling and thought that only Andrew Carnegie could do this, because he was a rare breed ,and I wasn’t in his league.  It made me realized how fear could make me feel like a failure. 

I remember when I was working on my self-confidence issues I use to think I was a failure, and how I was afraid of failing.  For me it was because they would be right.   “They” were my elders and my family.  My family culture was to find a job, and stay in it until you died, and it didn’t matter if you hated it.  Security was the top thing.  You had to be secure.  YOU DON’T TAKE ANY RISK! Then I came along, someone who always wanted to do things differently.  Against my family wishes, I would try something different, and sometimes it wouldn’t work out, and I would have to deal with, I told you so. 

What happened?  I started to be conditioned to not take a risk until I was sure I was going to succeed.  And I ended up doing exactly what I didn’t want to do.  Getting into jobs I hated.  Afraid to leave the security, the steady, and I might add, low paying salary. 

Starting my self-confidence journey has been the biggest risk I have ever taken.  I had to learn how to change old patterns and old ways of thinking.  Yes, I have make mistakes, and at times have fallen back into old patterns, but I’ve learned to learn from those mistakes, and now see the opportunities they present.   I no longer see them as failures.

When you ask yourself what if I fail? Instead ask, where is the opportunity? What can I do next to succeed?  What have I learned? What can I do differently? Once you have answered your questions, reevaluated, and ask do I still want this? Asking this question will help you clarify on what you really do want.

As you can see, failing can be a good thing.  Me personally, I don’t like the word failing, I prefer to say, “Well, that didn’t work, what can I do to make it work?”

Remember, the only person who can make you feel, think and sound like a failure is you.  The next time you ask yourself the question “What if I fail?”  Immediately ask, “How can I succeed?”
 
To Your Success!

Diana

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